waiting room

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waiting rooms have a strange gravity to them. this one knew more of me than I meant to share. maybe it lands somewhere close to you.

waitINgRooM waiting for someone to call my name is an anxiety machine/music in my headphones’ the only thing keeping me slow/sitting on forms, back to the wall,/TV screen goes static to snow/people here all look like Saturday cartoons/but no one’s unbeautiful/what if I run out of fight, do they know my life/or just suspect that I’ve been going about it all wrong/my heart is a knife turning like, Jesus, what the fuck, inside me/and it’s like if I turn deep enough…/there’s better places to be/as if any other place could be if I didn’t wait for it/I tell myself I’m somewhere else/& it’s not like it’s happening to me

23 responses to “waiting room”

  1. Cindy Georgakas Avatar
    Cindy Georgakas

    Such honest, raw deep emotions, Cookie. Sometimes we find our places we don’t want to be with anxiety, worry, fear etc and it sucks! Your song is an honest account of like when things suck. Thanks for sharing. Sending love! 💕

    Liked by 2 people

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    1. cookie Avatar
      cookie

      thank you for listening to my song, Cindy. I feel a lot of different things in the waiting room. putting them somewhere like in a song helps me a lot. x

      Like

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  2. graysummers Avatar
    graysummers

    I remember smiling when I first listened to this song back when you first released it cookie…because of the wonderful middle and end guitar moments. To me they both metaphorically leaped out to show the real you still existed in your awkward situation. The inner spirit and sparkle that still exists deep inside you despite the waiting room dilemma. Love the consistent guitar rhythm too. It is like an insistent ticking/thrumming clock which explains the awful mundane discomfort of your awaiting the appointment situation. The guitar is as poetical explanatory as your words. Thanks for sharing your discomforts in such an amazing and honest way. Cheers and all the best. 💫

    Liked by 2 people

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    1. cookie Avatar
      cookie

      Gray, you just revealed something about my song that might’ve been there all along, just beneath the surface. the ticking… yes, it is like time passing in a waiting room. and now that I sit with it, maybe even the passage of time in my life. I hadn’t quite seen it that way until now. you’re amazing. thank you.

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      1. graysummers Avatar
        graysummers

        I suppose we bring songs to their conclusions subliminally too cookie. Holistic story boards with little pieces of energy added, that dance within the vibe. Not realising the choices we sing, play, poetically word add to the final production. They show up and say ‘Hi!’ and become a perfectly natural inclusion. I love it when they show up, flourish and complete the whole result nicely. Cheers cookie. 💫

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Susana Cabaço Avatar
    Susana Cabaço

    Some places are not our place. We just have to be there. For a specific reason, which is just temporary. Not comfortable, not pleasent. But it’s just a phase. I guess your choice of “being somewhere else” ends up being a protective strategy. At least, it lessens the anxiety and discomfort. Very raw and honest lyric, Cookie. Thank you for this very human and realistic share. A lot to reflect on here. With appreciation and gratitude, for you and your expressions, sending light and blessings your way 🙏 🌟 and wishing you a beautiful weekend 🌞 💖🌻

    Liked by 3 people

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    1. cookie Avatar
      cookie

      🤍

      Liked by 1 person

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    2. cookie Avatar
      cookie

      also, Susana, I just wanted to say: when I close my eyes I can feel you sitting with me there, in the quiet hope of the moment, like I’m not alone in the waiting.

      Liked by 1 person

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      1. Susana Cabaço Avatar
        Susana Cabaço

        You are definitely NOT alone, Cookie! And yes, I sit by your side holding the moment with light and paving the unfolding with love. All is well, and it will be just fine. Soon, this phase will be just a fading memory in your brightest new place in life. You have a special place in the room of my heart; make it your waiting room whenever you need. I feel blessed to share my life journey with you, precious one. Appreciate you immensely!! Sending light, love, and blessings your way 🙏✨🌈💖🌻🌞

        Liked by 1 person

  4. Sheila “Spiral Sister” Murrey Avatar
    Sheila “Spiral Sister” Murrey

    “no one’s unbeautiful…” great line, cookie! It really grabs me.

    Liked by 1 person

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    1. cookie Avatar
      cookie

      🤍

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  5. Michele Lee Avatar
    Michele Lee

    The title alone grabbed me cookie and knowing your writing, I knew that would be just the beginning. Thank you for sharing your tender and vulnerable voice, in words and singing. 🌼

    Liked by 1 person

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    1. cookie Avatar
      cookie

      ♥️

      Liked by 1 person

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      1. Michele Lee Avatar
        Michele Lee

        ♥️

        Like

  6. destiny Avatar
    destiny

    “there’s better places to be…” and isn’t it nice that we can escape… through our thoughts 🤍

    “but no one’s unbeautiful..” and I like how you say this, Cookie …

    hope you’re well… 🤍💫

    Liked by 1 person

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    1. cookie Avatar
      cookie

      thank you, D.🤍💫

      most of how I’m doing is in this song. each day loops. energy crashes, cravings, bad thoughts arguing with good. even the quiet moments take effort. it’s one day at a time.
      x 🤷‍♀️

      Liked by 1 person

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      1. destiny Avatar
        destiny

        If I said hang in there…it would sound like I know what you’re going through…if I say you got this …it will sound again like I know what you’re going through….which I believe no one can really know that depth except the one that’s in deep … but I can say …as each to their own situations… different… but I feel you, Cookie …
        do “you” the best you can … and sometimes even a moment at a time is good enough…

        keep singing them … one day the winds might carry them so far away … they won’t be able to find their way back …to you 🤍💫

        Liked by 1 person

      2. cookie Avatar
        cookie

        💕

        Liked by 1 person

  7. Willie Torres Jr. Avatar
    Willie Torres Jr.

    Wow, Cookie… this hit deep. Waiting rooms really do hold pieces of us we never meant to give away.

    Your words are raw, real, and hauntingly beautiful.

    And I love the song, it was so beautiful. It had a Snow Patrol, Indie feel to it… I love it. 🎧❄️🖤

    Liked by 1 person

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    1. cookie Avatar
      cookie

      o, thank you, Willie! I have heard of that band. x

      Liked by 1 person

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      1. Willie Torres Jr. Avatar
        Willie Torres Jr.

        You are very welcome.

        Liked by 1 person

  8. Frank Hudson Avatar
    Frank Hudson

    Excellent song. Liked the short guitar arpeggios in it too.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. cookie Avatar
      cookie

      hi Frank, I hope you’re feeling better. thank you for liking my song. x

      Like

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