our group leader uses this cool exercise to help us reflect on and address the fears in our lives. she calls it fear in a hat.
in this exercise, each person anonymously writes down a fear on a piece of paper. you’re supposed to begin with the words, the worst thing that could happen would be… .
then she collects the papers with people’s fears in a NY Yankees cap, mixes them up, and hands them back randomly to the group.
one by one, each person reads a fear aloud and explains how they might feel if it happened. no one is supposed to comment — just move to the next person. after all the fears are shared, we talk about our reactions and observations.
it isn’t surprising that a lot of us in group are afraid of checking out, you know, Checking Out, one way or another. here’s some of what people wrote: the worst thing that could happen would be …
“not waking up.” “not flying.” “losing sleep.” “no more Cocoa Puffs.” “dreams failing me.” “the Knicks win in seven and I’m not there to see it.” “after this, nothing.” “I’m there when it happens.” “mac n’ cheese on the stove left alone forever.” and mine: “leaving mom and abuela.“
this week we talked about how anxiety disorders and substance use disorders often co-occur, with substances frequently used as a form of self-medication or coping mechanism.
we also learned about catastrophizing, a thought pattern where we imagine and expect the worst outcomes. by recognizing this, we can adopt healthier behaviors and break negative thinking habits, like focusing on the present and on what we can control, replacing negative thoughts with positive ones, and not being so hard on ourselves.
our group leader said that when fear arises, the goal isn’t to make things easy, just like a marathon runner can’t finish the race without effort. instead, fear can motivate us to perform at our best, preventing the worst-case scenario from happening.
fear always shows up when I’m doing music. I have come to realize it isn’t there to scare me, but to let me know that what I’m doing is worth it.
this is the iPhone recording from the group session the other night of a Nico song I love singing, These Days.
cookie nieves 
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