dollar tree

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my dad died before I was born. I can say I know him better now than I did when he was alive.

there are photographs. some of his clothes and shoes are still in my mom’s bedroom closet. we have his bottle of aftershave and little things he collected, like old metro and transit tokens and beautiful seashells from Brighton Beach.

most of all, the stories: my mom tells me about how they met, what he was like, and how excited he was about becoming a father.

I feel like if I were to ask my dad how sad he was about dying, the knowledge that I am nearer to him now and know him better now would make his passing easier in his own mind.

this song is called dollar tree. it’s one of the ways that I will keep him alive.

doLLaR tREE what if I met you in the dollar tree store/what if I met you in subway air/could you be here in/a tunnel of the underground/if it’s not here, then/you’re coming/if you’ve never seen me, then you will/if you don’t know I’m there,/then both of us are riding somewhere/you better be there

(for my friends outside the US and Canada, dollar tree is a discount variety store)

19 responses to “dollar tree”

  1. Sara Flower Avatar
    Sara Flower

    Wow this is beautiful. Thank you for sharing. I love that you have items of your dad that he collected before passing away. I will now listen to your song and try not to cry.

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    1. cookie Avatar
      cookie

      Sara, it means so much to me that you like my words and music.

      Liked by 1 person

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      1. Sara Flower Avatar
        Sara Flower

        I really loved your song. Came into work with my eyeliner melted off. It was worth it. ❤️

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      2. cookie Avatar
        cookie

        o Sara, I am happy and sorry both at once. xo

        Liked by 1 person

      3. Sara Flower Avatar
        Sara Flower

        It’s all good. I love art & you are an amazing artist. 😊

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Cindy Georgakas Avatar
    Cindy Georgakas

    Such touching post, Cookie. I love this perspective and your connection that you are making in your song and life to bringing him in. Awww how lovely and touching he was happy to have you!!!! 💗💗💗 You bring him closer for sure.

    Liked by 1 person

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    1. cookie Avatar
      cookie

      I will always feel I have him, too. thank you, Cindy.

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  3. Cindy Georgakas Avatar
    Cindy Georgakas

    omg LOVE Dollar tree

    Liked by 1 person

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    1. cookie Avatar
      cookie

      the store, o me too!

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  4. Michele Lee Avatar
    Michele Lee

    Your posts always give me many thoughts and things to respond to. Thank you for sharing your tender, creative, and unique voice, cookie, both through your writing and singing. 🙏🏻 I admire you. When I read my grandfather’s WWII letters, I feel close to him – it is like getting to know him for the first time because he died when I was a five.

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    1. cookie Avatar
      cookie

      o, I remember your post about your grandfather. so you know exactly what I mean. um, as usual.

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      1. Michele Lee Avatar
        Michele Lee

        ha, yes, that is usually how it goes. Happy it does. Thank you for remembering and for being you!

        Liked by 1 person

  5. Destiny Avatar
    Destiny

    a heartfelt one, Cookie…as your thoughts and words go…always deep and touching 🤍💫

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    1. cookie Avatar
      cookie

      🤍

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  6. graysummers Avatar
    graysummers

    Love the beautiful opening short guitar phrase (amazingly played by the way) to introduce yourself to your father. Then the intense urgency of your chord persistent strumming, whilst committing your emotions both vocally and lyrically into their dynamics. You’ve echoed the words in your lovely heartfelt story here into the actual song perfectly cookie. Intent or subliminal? Doesn’t matter. You went with what your heart told you. Beautiful work as always. All the best.

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    1. cookie Avatar
      cookie

      when it began, Gray, the song didn’t give me the heads up, that it was about my dad. it went there, and I went with it. when it was finished I felt my dad’s presence and experienced what I had written in a way I hadn’t before. I wish I could explain that better but I bet you know exactly what I mean. x

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      1. graysummers Avatar
        graysummers

        You’ve explained it perfectly cookie. Subliminally I wrote, and still write, lyrics that were/are highly linked to past emotions too. We feel that sometimes we don’t want to commit certain personal heartaches or private thoughts to our songs. But they do struggle and fight to get out there. Rightly so. As said, subliminally charging their way to be heard. And when the lyrics do succeed to get written, alongside the appropriate song melody, it feels a weight has been lifted off the shoulders and mind.

        I can identify about half a dozen of mine that are very personal. I intend to record a few of them over the coming weeks/months. I want to include lyrics with the recordings too cookie. So maybe those songs can be read and recognised as such themes. Thank you, as ever cookie, for your amazing posts. And replies. Brilliant.

        Liked by 1 person

  7. LoveLifeHappiness&More💙💙 Avatar
    LoveLifeHappiness&More💙💙

    Really great share. Thank you.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. cookie Avatar
      cookie

      thank you back

      Liked by 1 person

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